4. A PROPER CHRISTIAN BURIAL
Now, to the other matter with which I have business to discuss with you. I think that if Sheila did not leave a final will and testament, she should be buried rather than cremated. I can only imagine her father, God rest his soul, bearing the image of his daughter being put into an oven - even if she is already stiff as a board. Now, I most certainly must stick my flabby neck into this issue and kindly insist that our family take a stand and advocate heartily and heavily for a proper Christian burial. I know that times are hard, and we may find it difficult to think straight, but as God is my witness (who is yours Hank?) I find myself being unable to console my thoughts with any other option.